What movies have not aged well?

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

-Bond forcing himself on Pussy.

Goldfinger

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-Bond slaps Tania pretty hard, and gets rough with her when he tries to get her to confess what her orders were.

-J W Pepper

Diamonds Are Forever

What does it mean when I have a dream where my friend died? I had this dream last night where one of my friends died in a shootout and I woke up crying.

-In the second half of Daylights, Bond gets aid from Afghan guerrillas. Rambo III is set against the same backdrop of the Soviets’ campaign in Afghanistan, getting help from the brave, starry-eyed, bold, freedom-loving peasant patriots against the cruel rapey Russians, and it even ends with a dedication to the mudjaheddin.

-Bond slapping Tracy.

-Bond tricks the virginal Miss Solitaire into having sex with him.

What do porn stars do when they get old?

-Note how the next couple of ones were ….well…as grounded in reality as you can be with Bond.

-Bond getting slaphappy again, this time with Tiffany Case.

-”Why do Chinese girls taste different to all other girls?”

Do you have any problem dating a younger man?

A View to a Kill

-Choo Me? Hai Fat?

-The comedy French taxi driver, also over-acting. Someone doesn’t like the French…

Why are men so attracted to big breasts?

-Two words. Mickey Rooney.

The Living Daylights & Rambo III

The Man with the Golden Gun

When a black man and a white woman have a child, does the child become white? If a white man and a black woman have a child, does the child become black?

You Only Live Twice

-Bond disguised as a Japanese fisher looks exactly like - Sean Connery wearing a bad wig.

Live and Let Die

What is the best way to get my wife to become a hotwife?

From Russia With Love

-”She is very sexyful!”

-Bond getting rough with Miss Anders, and slapping her. Christ!

Why hasn't Japan legalized same-sex marriage?

-”That should keep you in curry…” said to an Indian agent.

-Comedy gay hitmen Mr Wint and Mr Kidd

-Tracy’s father having uh…interesting ideas about what a happy marriage should be. Hell, he punches her out at one point.

What is your favourite true story to tell at a party?

-”Ah so!”

Moonraker

-”Quarrel. Fetch my shoes!”

Why is there so much free porn on the internet?

On Her Majesty’s Secret Service

Dr No

-All the bad guys are black.

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-Bond’s idea of placating Goodnight after being forced to hide in the cupboard all night while he’s making out with Miss Anders is to tell her that her time will come soon…

Octopussy

-What was with the over-acting of the French guy Mayday kills in the Eiffel Tower? Been watching too much Allo Allo?

How many boxes 600 x 400 x 200 go into a 20ft container?